Remembering Dr. Arthur Ablin

We at Family House mourn the loss of Dr. Art Ablin, beloved Co-Founder of our organization and a true visionary.

Art was Professor Emeritus at UCSF Benioff Children’s Hospital, where he served as Chief of Pediatric Oncology, and was a leader in his field. Art was both a general pediatrician and pediatric oncologist who treated scores of young patients since the 1950s, as well as a friend and mentor to countless folks lucky enough to know him. Among his many good works is the creation of Family House in 1981, which started because of his vision and commitment to all families whose children face cancer and other life-threatening diseases.

Out of a desire to provide family-centered care in partnership with UCSF, Art’s vision was to provide free housing and basic needs for the families of seriously ill young patients. In the 1980s, Art noticed many of his young patients’ family members sleeping in their cars or in hospital waiting rooms, unable to pay for a hotel. “Family House was set up as cost-free place for families to stay, but also as a center based very much on communal experience, so these families could share with each other what they were going through,” Art said.

In 1981, Art and others raised nearly $500,000 to buy housing from the Mormon Church that sat adjacent to the UCSF Children’s Hospital (later UCSF Benioff Children’s Hospital), with the intention of providing housing for patients’ families. With the opening of the new Nancy and Stephen Grand Family House, Debbie and Art Ablin have ensured that families will always have a home to turn to when patients need medical attention in San Francisco.

While Art was a highly regarded physician and internationally sought-after speaker on the topic of pediatric hematology, his compassion and unwavering dedication to children and families at Family House for the past 36 years has produced a model of community that we celebrate this day and every day of the year. Those of us who had the unbelievable pleasure of working with Art since Family House was founded 36 years ago know that his talent, passion, wisdom, humor, and loving spirit infuse every aspect of our organization and the work we do for kids and families. Art’s inherent talent for nurturing what is best in us will live on as we are inspired by his values and humanity.

From all of us and the thousands of families that have stayed at Family House, we will remember Art with the great respect and love that he gave so freely to others.

We are so lucky to have known him and will miss him deeply.

We Run with Kaitlyn: A Massive Success!

 Thanks to the incredible Shelly Burr and her amazing network of supporters, the We Run With Kaitlyn fundraiser for Family House was a massive success - blowing past Shelly’s $20,000 goal, with over $29,000 total funds raised!

Though they live in Texas, Shelly was part of the MOMS study at UCSF in 2009, and she and her family stayed at Family House for 3 months while Kaitlyn received in-utero treatment for Spina Bifida. The groundbreaking surgery was successful, and Kaitlyn is now 7 years old and exceeding all expectations.

The Burr family are all very active, and they decided to fundraise for Family House in this year’s Woodlands Marathon. In years past, the family fundraisers have been called We Run for Kaitlyn, but this year, Kaitlyn was running with the team!

Over 130 people donated to support We Run With Kaitlyn fundraiser - incredible!
We raised a total of $29,297 from 137 donors! We were also sponsored by several local businesses: Whitfield Design (a graphic designer who created our logo and hosted the website that sold all of the shirts), Edison McDowell & Hetherington, LLP (Kendall's law firm), Gustafson Dental, New Balance Houston, Hector's Mexican Restaurant, Global Academic Coaching, Tutti Frutti Park Lakes, Simply Baked Sweets, Kumon Fall Creek, and Smiles by Woehst.

Please share with us some of the events that contributed to the big goal:
* We had “Run with Kaitlyn” days at Persona Pizza, our local Tutti Frutti, and our local Chick-Fil-A, all making donations.
* We had several bake sales - my sister in Utah raised $510; my sister-in-law, niece, and nephews made cookies that sold at her mom's Soup Shoppe in Riverside, CA and raised $512; and my friend Dani sold customized Valentines cookies and raised a few hundred dollars.
* Jones Day, LLP - Dallas, TX office hosted a jeans day and raised around $750.
* Sales of our We Run With Kaitlyn shirts raised $1,551.

We also had some really wonderful donated items and raised over $2,000 at the fundraiser auction!
* Italiano's Restaurant donated around $1,000 worth of food
* One Block Over - a local band played free of charge
* Dynamic Events - Hosted a picture booth
* Golf Club of Houston - Donated a foursome of golf (worth $700)
* Fall Creek Showbiz Cinemas - Donated a gift basket and a one year unlimited movie pass to their theater
* Rising Sun Sushi - Donated two $25 gift certificates
* Nothing Bundt Cakes - Donated one 10" decorated cake certificate

* Friends also donated beautiful gifts and gift baskets, including Houston Rodeo tickets, handmade wooden cutting boards, a beach gift basket, Italy gift basket, handbag, and more! We also raised $550 at a bake sale from homemade desserts!

How was the experience this year compared to We Run For Kaitlyn fundraisers you’ve done in the past?
We had such a personal connection to Family House, and having first-hand experience with the amazing things they are doing every day for families - it was so easy to talk about the "why" of the fundraising.  Then, being able to promote it as We Run WITH Kaitlyn, and knowing she had come so far since we had done the prenatal surgery for her in San Francisco all those years ago, it was incredible.  Crossing that finish line with her, surrounded by friends and family was one of the best moments of my life.

Kaitlyn had a great time at the fundraisers and the races.  It was so much fun for her to see so many friends and family there to support her - especially at the 2K.  She said, ”Running across the finish line was my favorite part.  When I crossed I felt good, great, wonderful, amazing.  My friend Lily was there, and my cousins Bella, Micah, Joshua, and Faith."

What were challenges around this fundraiser?
We were lucky enough to have so many donated items by the community that we were sort of forced into hosting a fundraiser in order to auction them all off.  I had many friends step up to help with the planning, and the more help I received, the bigger and more awesome the fundraiser became.  We coordinated a local band to play, donated pasta dinner, tables and chairs, a bake sale, an auction, a face painter, a balloon artist, a photo booth, and the New Balance mascot come along for all the fun.  It was amazing, but also very stressful, because there were just so many details to coordinate.  We also had two races this time (the 2K Friday night, and the marathon/half marathon/5Ks the next morning) instead of just the one day of races.  So, making sure everyone had directions/parking/and all the rest of the information was kind of insane.  But, we made it, and it was all worth it because we had made some incredible memories and raised money for our favorite charity!

Do you have any advice for someone that might want to undertake a fundraiser like this?
Go for it!  My favorite part about fundraising is that you get to see the best in people.  We reached out to so many businesses and friends, and the response was amazing.  People we didn't know very well donated thousands of dollars.  Companies who just heard our story and had no connection to us donated huge prizes for our auction.  Friends and family took on their own fundraising just because they love us and they find what Family House does so inspiring.  So many people offer to donate their time and services and want to be part of what you are doing.  I was incredibly moved so many in my community who got involved.

If you really believe in what you are raising money for, and tell your story - give the "why" behind what you are doing, people will respond to it. You can do it!

Do you have any advice for a parent who is just starting a journey of having a seriously ill child?
When we stayed at Family House after the prenatal surgery, there were so many unknowns. There were times we were crippled with fear about the future.  I think the best advice I would have is just to take these moments one at a time.  If you can make it through this period of time, you will be ready to take on the next.  Just like with any of your children, you wouldn't be ready to parent a teenager when you are still in the baby-stage - thinking too far down the road with illnesses or disabilities can just compound fears and worries without being able to do anything productive.  Cautiously optimistic is the phrase I tend to come back to.  And, these moments that you probably took for granted in your life - they become incredible memories that you would never trade for anything.  Because watching your child do things you were told they might not do - it's a gift I will always be grateful for.

Visit https://www.werunwithkaitlyn.com to watch the inspiring video featuring the Burr family!

Co-Founder Dr. Art Ablin: Happy 90th Birthday!

Happy Birthday to Family House co-founder Dr. Arthur Ablin! As a leader in the field of Pediatric Oncology, Dr. Ablin has been treating young patients since the 1950’s. We celebrate his legacy and thank him for his vision of creating a sanctuary that is free to all families during their child’s treatment. Dr. Ablin’s compassion, focus on our mission, and unwavering dedication to Family House for the past 35 years has produced a model of community that we celebrate this day and every day of the year – from all of us and the over 35,000 families that have stayed at Family House, Art, thank you for your remarkable leadership.

Family House Family Stories: Cailean Sterling, Brain Tumor Survivor

Watch the latest Family House Family Stories video: Cailean Sterling, Brain Tumor Survivor

Rockstar Volunteers: Vagaboom

Have you ever tried to stop and smell the flowers?

Our families and staff certainly have with the help from Amanda, a specialist in aromatherapy and botanical remedies made from natural ingredients you would find in the home.

Amanda came to Family House from a nonprofit called Vagaboom whose mission is to supplement diminished arts and physical education in schools, community centers, and women’s shelters.

We were lucky enough to have Vagaboom artist and therapist Amanda working with Family House throughout February. She taught patients, families, and even staff how to stop and relax through art and creative activities using your sense of smell to guide you through the process.

“It’s a smelly world out there,” said Amanda, "we should take the time to stop and smell something that we enjoy, that calms, and heals." Families got to make their own body scrubs, perfumed oils, and facial masks to take with them wherever they go.

Amanda believes that these small things can make our bodies relax, and can be incorporated in our everyday lives, no matter how hectic things get. We thank Amanda and Vagaboom for their support in making the families’ experience just a little easier at Family House.

Family House Staff Spotlight: Jessica Creager

Interview with Jessica Creager, Director of Finance and Special Events

How did you come to be at Family House?
When I first started at Family House in November 1997, as Assistant Administrator, there were only three full-time staff members. I heard about the position through the then-Executive Director, Cliff Berg, who was looking for someone who knew how to do Quickbooks, and I had that experience. I never knew about Family House before I was offered the job, but I've grown to love it!

How has Family House Changed since you first started?
When I first started, we housed 10 families a night, and now we house 34 families a night.  We had only one building; now we have two.  The annual budget has increased from $350,000 to $1.6 million. We were only three staffers, and there's eleven of us now.

What are some of your favorite Family House memories?
The Giants stadium AT&T Ballpark event! We got to celebrate Family House's 30th Anniversary with families from so many different years. It was great to see so many families that I've gotten to know while working at Family House, and to see the continuity.

Also, getting to know Nayiri Torigian, who was a young woman who battled cancer. She and her family, they were just so sweet.  She sadly passed away, but getting to know that family was really important, especially important for me, for when I later went through cancer treatment.  She was inspiring to me.

Working at Family house before my cancer diagnosis gave me so much insight to what was coming. Knowing all the kids and all the families that I'd met actually made me more brave in the face of dealing with the treatments. Treatment wasn't as scary to me because I had known personally, especially little ones, who had faced it with no problems.  So, I figured I couldn't be a total wimp about the whole thing!  [Laughs.]  The great acceptance I felt, having a personal illness, and coming back and being greeted with open arms…  not ostracized, not something strange, since at Family House, it's the norm. I've been cancer-free since 2002, and am now officially cured!

Another great thing about being at Family House has been getting to know Family House founders, The Ablins.  They've been so welcoming to me, kind of treating me like family through all these years.  It's been an honor to get to know them and hear their stories, and how they started Family House, but also how they've done so many other amazing things throughout their lives.

Learn more about the caring staff at Family House:  http://www.familyhouseinc.org/staff.html 

Gratitude

A personal note from Joey Kotfica, Social Media Coordinator:

I'm still "the new girl" at Family House - I've only been on staff since February 2013.  I've grown so much this year - sharing the joys and sorrows of the families who stay here. Our offices are in the same building, and so, we will have morning coffee with parents, or take a little foosball break in the living room with some of the kids in the afternoon. I've gotten to know and admire so many people who pass through our doors: the families for their strength; the patients for their courage and optimism; the volunteers and donors for their generosity of time, talent, and treasure; and my amazingly compassionate co-workers.

The air these last few weeks here at Family House has been a little different - more energized. The phones and doorbells are ringing, we're getting emails, cards, and social media messages from so many people wanting to know how they can help.  We're getting messages of gratitude from our families in every form possible. Last week, a young couple who have been staying at Family House regularly all year came downstairs, and as one of them started to say thank you for the services we provide, she started crying, unable to speak her words of thanks. (So of course, I started crying with her.)

I've known for years what a special place Family House is, but it hasn't been until this year that I've been able to truly appreciate all of the love (really, just so much love) within our little family.  Thank you all for sharing that with me, and with each other.

Happy holidays to each of you, and best wishes for a healthy 2014.

Learn more about the caring staff at Family House:  http://www.familyhouseinc.org/staff.html 

Seamus Berkeley: Portraits of Family House

What would Family House look like through the eyes of an artist?

Seamus Berkeley, a soft-spoken painter residing in Berkeley, has embarked upon a multi-year artistic endeavor entitled Portraits of Family House. The goal of the project is to capture the heart and soul of Family House by painting patients, families, staff, and volunteers. Family House is a nonprofit in San Francisco that offers free, temporary housing to families of children being treated at the UCSF Benioff Children's Hospital for cancer and other life-threatening illnesses.

Seamus first came to know Family House through Volunteer Coordinator Karen Banks. Though she was not yet a staff member, Karen said, "Let's talk about what I'm passionate about!" and told Seamus all about the organization and the families served. Instead of a straight donation, Seamus said, "I want to do something bigger, more meaningful."

"I thought it was a great project, and then I started meeting people, and it was way beyond what I ever imagined. When your world has just been pulled out from under you and you don't know what you're going to do next, I want to know 'What gets you through this?'  For example, the painting of Kelly and Devon - she's had a continuous series of difficulties in her life.  She said, 'Sometimes I feel like I'm in this darkness, and when I close my eyes, I call out, and see a white light.' So in the painting of her and Devon, you see that she is surrounded by a white light."

You might recognize the tender portrait of Kelly and Devon, recalling the Madonna and Child. The photograph that Seamus took for this painting was featured on the recent Family House Mother's Day card, along with a snippet of Kelly's story.  Devon is Kelly's miracle baby, and the loving bond between them is captured in Seamus' art.

Among the faces of the Portraits of Family House, you will see a large-as-life portrait of Dr. Arthur Ablin and his wife, Debbie Ablin, set in the back yard of their North Bay home.  Together with the help of other pediatric oncologists at UCSF, the Ablins founded Family House in 1981. The portrait now hangs proudly in the living room at 50 Irving Street.  It is important to tell the story not just of the patients and families, because Family House is a community of people giving and sharing and celebrating life together.

"I have three children, all adults and grown up now.  We didn't have any medical traumas like the families here are going through… but having had some experience of a traumatic event, and knowing how disconcerting that can be…" Seamus trailed off, but continued, "Everyone here is helping other people manage and get through their trauma."

It is fitting that Karen be a subject in this series, and hers is the latest portrait completed.  "There is always the challenge of how to paint anyone; every painting is a new thing."  When pressed to describe the process of this particular project, following decades of experience with portrait work, Seamus smiles, "Honestly, I think it's some of my best work."

To learn more of the Portraits of Family House project, click here: http://seamusberkeley.com

To make a donation to the project, visit: http://www.fracturedatlas.org/site/fiscal/profile?id=6255

You can also follow Seamus on Facebook to get the latest updates: http://www.facebook.com/PortraitsOfFamilyHouse

To learn more about Family House, please visit: http://www.familyhouseinc.org

Family House Volunteer Spotlight: Cari Cronquist

 The Family House June Volunteer Spotlight shines on Cari Cronquist, "the girl with the smile!" We are so lucky to have such kind, generous volunteers!  Even something as simple as a great attitude can go a long way.  Thank you, Cari, for volunteering with Family House!  You rock!

"Cari Cronquist volunteered as the Operations Volunteer Leader in the Spring 2013 semester at 50 Irving St. However she has become so much more in her role at Family House.

Cari has become an important part of maintaining the 50 Irving Street facility. Throughout the semester, she has been supporting Paul Goold, Director of Operations, in tasks such as disinfecting, organizing,  and deep-cleaning common spaces, bedrooms, and the garage. Cari was also no stranger to managing other volunteers as she helped lead corporate groups and weekly volunteers perform various house functions.

Besides volunteering with Family House, Cari used to tutor and work with underprivileged kids in an after school program at two different elementary schools in San Jose. She has also done a lot of volunteer work with kids as a soccer coach for summer camps; she currently volunteers as a Research Assistant at UCSF  in the Langley Porter Institute.

In her spare time, she loves to play soccer and work out. Cari is known for her smile because you'll never see her without her signature ear-to-ear grin. Cari, we love your smiling face every day you are at Family House. Thank you!"

Get involved with Family House! Learn more at http://www.familyhouseinc.org/volunteer.html

A Moment of Inspiration

THE HOUSE OF BELONGING

I awoke
this morning
in the gold light
turning this way
and that

thinking for
a moment
it was one
day
like any other.

But
the veil had gone
from my
darkened heart
and
I thought

it must have been the quiet
candlelight
that filled my room,

it must have been
the first
easy rhythm
with which I breathed
myself to sleep,

it must have been
the prayer I said
speaking to the otherness
of the night.

And
I thought
this is the good day...

by David Whyte

Inspiration to get you through your day!

"If children have the ability to ignore all odds and percentages, then maybe we can all learn from them. When you think about it, what other choice is there but to hope? We have two options, medically and emotionally: give up, or fight like hell."

                  --Lance Armstrong